I’ve dislocated my shoulder yet again.
It was the hardest to get back of them all.
The usual method of easing my arm down and it sliding back didn’t work. Instead, the ER doctor had me roll on my stomach and hang my arm over the side of the bed. Then she tied ten pounds of weight to my upper arm and eventually, after a lot of patience and breathing, the muscles did relax and it popped back in. Still, there was a moment when I was worried it wasn’t going to go back in.
I’ve come to the realization lately that I spend a whole hell of a lot of time sitting around thinking about how awesome things used to be. It’s so easy to do that, isn’t it? To only remember the awesome things from the past and especially when things in the present aren’t exactly as I would want them to be. So instead of wishing for something that I only partially remember, I’m going to have to start creating as much good stuff in the present as I can.
Again, I know I must sound so ridiculous, but for me, the only way I can ever hope to hold myself accountable to anything is to say it outloud.
My resolutions from January have been going about the same as the last time I cared to mention them. TV viewing is not getting out of control, I’ve been trying to spend as much time with the kids as I can (and I’ve had some extra time given Spring Break on my own). Book reading is up thanks to the Hunger Games trilogy and my making has been on the increase due to the fact that I’ve committed myself to an arts festival in May. Eating and excersing are really nothing to write home about for now. But having the farmers market back in full-swing is helping a lot. Correspondence is tricky. This is where I might get bogged down in nostalgia. Trying not to do that. And snarkiness is hopefully being kept in-check. I’ve been super good at not looking at news (and comments) that I know will do nothing but get me riled up. That has helped a lot.
So I think I still have a manageable list of things that I need to keep in-check and to keep working on. Adding one to be mindful of making the present as good as it can possibly be, and not spending a lot of time wistfully considering the fairly recent past, is not going to kill me. In fact, I think it can only help.
I know quite a few people who, for various reasons, find themselves alone for periods of time without their spouses around, and I don’t really know how they manage not to go insane.
For the second time this month, I’m home with the kids while Brendan is not. First, over Spring Break he went to San Francisco for a conference for four days. Don’t get me wrong, I had fun hanging out with the kids and taking a break from working, but it was exhausting. Last night, he left again for a camping trip with the Muskoxen. He’ll be back tomorrow, and it’s not like today was hard on me or anything (the kids had been sick but they are better now and both went off to their usual school and daycare today).
The evenings are always a bit harder for me. I find myself wishing I had a pal to hang out with. Locally, there really isn’t anyone. I do have friends, they just live hours away. I’m sure I’ve mentioned before that I am really awful at meeting people. I’ve (sort of) tried and it’s never quite clicked. Having kids has actually made it harder. I over-think it, I know.
Wah, wah, wah. I actually feel bad being all angsty about this stuff. There are people with real problems and here I am all melancholy because my husband went on a trip with his BFFs for a day and a half? Jesus. What a hard life I have.
That being said, I think I shall go somewhere by myself. Alone. Maybe see some damn art.
We’ve had a ridiculous amount of rain. Ridiculous.
Last night, I was sitting at a PTA meeting at school, which was of course running long, waiting for the conversation about where people should stand to pick up their children after school when my phone rang. I saw that it was Brendan but figured that he was just wondering why I wasn’t home yet – 45 minutes after the meeting was supposed to be over. My phone wasn’t catching much of a signal, so I let it go. And then I immediately got a text. So I walked out of the meeting to look at it.
Not exactly the best text to receive. As I walked outside, the rain was coming down seriously hard. Roads were flooding. Our street was full of water – it was almost over the curb. I came home to find our basement carpet soaking wet, all the electronics up off the floor (phew) and everything moved away from the exterior walls.
Poor Brendan was outside bailing out our one window well with a pink beach bucket. I took over and he went to the store fingers crossed that they’d still have something to help solve our problem. Water was just pouring in the window well from underground. It simply had no place else to go (we have gotten somewhere around 12-15 inches of rain the last 24 hours!). Thankfully, Bren was able to pick up a sump pump and get it working so we didn’t have to bail all night.
There’s no school, and no daycare today. Hopefully there’s very little in the way of rain.
Bridget starts school on Tuesday. She’s thrilled about it. I know that she’ll do great. I’m not worried about her making friends, or riding the bus, or anything else. No, I’m worried about me having to meet other parents. This afternoon at lunch time we’ve got a playdate thing at the school where all the new kindergarteners are invited.
I’m sitting here getting all nervous and worked up at the prospect of having to talk to another parent. I’m forcing myself to just do it. Because honestly, the thing that I am really afraid of is silly – I’m afraid of just standing there looking like an idiot having no one to talk to.
It’s ironic really, because more often than not, I end up putting my foot into my (giant) mouth. It’s guaranteed that I’ll offend someone. It’s high time that I just embrace that, and look for the other mom who’s laughing at the offended person and be friends with HER.
Bridget has gotten into her “story tapes”. Brendan had some cassette/books from when he was a kid, but only a few with both the storybook and tape that match up. The other day on eBay, he came across an auction of some tapes and books some of which we had the book and not the tape and vice versa, plus some new ones that we didn’t have yet — like Mary Poppins.
They came today. And in a really awesome yellow suitcase case to boot. Now she’s got the matching tape for It’s a Small World and Alice in Wonderland. In addition to the aforementioned Mary Poppins, the other new set was Brer Rabbit and the Tar Baby.
According to the Wikipedia article:
“The phrase is considered by most Americans to be an ethnic slur. However, since most Americans have never heard the phrase and have no knowledge of its origins, it is ludicrous to make this assertion.”
I guess if Wikipedia says it’s not racist, it must be true? It just doesn’t quite sit well with me for whatever reason. I feel like we should give it a listen to hear how bad it sounds. And then get rid of it. Maybe sell it and then donate the money.
And… I listened to it. The story itself is not so bad: Rabbit escapes from Fox and Bear. But the tape, oh the tape. Since the story is from Song of the South, the tape sounds pretty much like the SNL skit.
I had to go and mention that John is a pretty good sleeper because all hell has broken loose. Last night it was party time at 1:30am until oh, 4:30 or so. Normally on a Friday morning, this wouldn’t be so bad because I could sleep in; however, today we had to go for his 4 month checkup. So now he’s cranky because he’s overtired, teething and had shots today. It’s been full of awesome. I was hoping he’d just pass out and sleep all morning, but alas, it was not meant to be. He’s finally settled down and sleeping in his crib. Hopefully that will last more than 20 minutes.
I’ve sort of mentioned the guy who lives down the street before. He and his buddies tend to test out their cars by running them down to the stop sign and around the park. It’s terribly annoying. And now that it’s spring, it’s become more prevalent. Granted, I’ve never been down there to tell the guy how much I hate it, but it just seems like common sense.
I’ve got nothing against a guy working on his car at his house and testing it out on the road. In fact, the guy across the street from Mr. Monte Carlo works on his bike from time to time, but it’s not every single day. I feel like it’s just gone a little bit too far at this point. To me, it seems like he’s running a business out of his home, fixing up cars/ATVs/motorcycles… So it’s not just him, but a bunch of people. This morning when I heard him run his car up and down the road, I just went ahead and called the police complaint line. We live on a street that has extra fines — because it is a cut through and has playgrounds. Hopefully a police presence will take care of the issue.
We got Bridget a bed this afternoon (from IKEA of course).
We thought we were being all slick and wouldn’t have to get a new mattress with a toddler bed. No such luck. Her crib mattress is about 10 inches too short. Doesn’t that defeat the purpose of a toddler bed? So it’s back to IKEA for Brendan for a new mattress and some sheets.
And we also planned to keep the crib together and just move it to the guest room. That plan was also foiled. The crib wouldn’t fit through the doorway. So now it’s in pieces. I hope this transition goes OK.
Did I mention Brendan’s going out of town tomorrow evening?
We have termites.
Not actually in our house, but at the shed and on the edge of the deck. As if camel crickets and ants weren’t enough.